The Tweezers

Dancing Around Destiny

The Cruelty Of A New Season

7 Months…

For the last 7 months, I’ve been struggling with a sense of loss that I spend too much effort and gain nothing in return of whatever I’m doing, and lots of personal DE-ATTACHMENT circles I’ve had to endure emotionally and spiritually.

Getting into the “New” is always confusing because it never turns backwards into what you studied, have known or what you’ve done. “NEW” always sees something DIFFERENT and edgy to understand.  It’s like something else is calling, another path is stretching for you, another road is rising and light is just spreading out of a room while a door squeaks OPEN. Won’t you respond to that? Won’t you go check that out? I’d sure do…

The problem with new doors and all that phase rush,  is that it requires BLIND FAITH, to let yourself fully “IN” into the UNKNOWN, to embrace it with wide open arms, or else you wouldn’t take the whole GLORIOUS snap. Your DESTINY. And you can’t COMPLETELY see anything! You gotta just follow the path, the signs, and the LIGHT!

And now I get it. Now I know. But it’s so frustrating that I need to dive in full strength into this ONE, this NEW, this Time.

3 Weeks…

for the last 3 weeks, I’ve spent almost 11 hours a day under piles of clothing, stuff, books, notebooks and hand written papers  looking into them to pick out whats gonna stay on me forever and what has to go.

And a whisperer voice inside of me says: “You are about to spread your Golden Wings and Soar away with me, over mountain tops, ocean waves and spear the clouds, would you think EXTRA  “anything”  be of any use to you, when I’m taking you to soar with the Eagles?!.” Everything has to go…

11 years…

But I never thought it was gonna be that painful, that haaarrrrrd to let go. 11 years of ages spoke back to me of who I was, who I am and mirrored my past into the future I wanted. Even though, those dusty piles of precious moments that took me back to endless longings and desires, this time, it feels so cut out!

Welcome Mr. New!

I had to leave full time and freelance at my job. I had to tear lots and lots of stuff before my eyes to trash them away. I had to hold a Garage Sale to sell all my precious things. Dresses. Shoes. Earings. Books. Favorite everything…And the main issue with mentioning “I had to” is that despite how hard of it to close a season, it comes out easily spontaneous but inevitable with so much FAVOR and Grace to cover every move and every step I’ve taken so far.  It’s as if it’s OK to move the Roots of a huge aging Tree to pluck it out of its soil and deep grounds to go somewhere else that fits for a Grandiose Rise in a Forest, just like that! That easy…


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This entry was posted on September 27, 2012 by in Uncategorized, Words and tagged , , , , , , , , .
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